Cripes!

Okay, I woke up this morning to check my Blogger Dashboard for any possible updates, merely to find a Post on a Blog entitled "Warrior Cats Story" with no spaces included, whatsoever, and writing about a- Yes, you guessed it!- Coffee Maker! A Black and Decker model, to be exact.
Okay, what? I find multiple troubles with that statement- For starters, the obvious- It's called "Warrior Cats Story," pulled directly from the Boom Series, and yet we're on the topic of Coffee Makers? Ahh, you're right, I heard that was currently popular in the Fandom- It's supposed to make the obsessive, moronic fans less stupid. -_- Continuing with that statement, the fact that a Warrior Cats Fan-Fiction is on my, of all peoples' Dashboards is rather odd- Considering that I do not read, and have absolutely not plans to start reading Warriors Fan-Fiction anytime in the near- And distant- Future. So, why was it placed under my Followed Blogs? Okay, I understand: "Jersey, why are you even bothering to tell us your ridiculous story? It has no use to us, does it?" Ahh, you see, this is not a story- It is a warning. Out of curiosity, and suspicion of a possible Virus or Scam, I figured that I take my chances with my iPod, to see exactly what it was. Cautiously, I clicked upon the site, and just as soon as it at last loaded the Webpage, I was swiftly redirected to a second. As you can guess, I did not stick around long enough to see exactly what it was, though I did get a slight glance of the link. The first portion was a selection of random numbers, and the second was a "Biz" type of link. I'm not exactly sure what type of attack this could be, though it could be similar to what is shown here in this video below, by SophosLabs. ^.^:

All in all, be careful, and in the case that you do see a Post on your Dashboard even the slightest bit similar to my experience, do not click to see more! Take caution, and keep Blogging! (Wow, what a lame way to end the Post. :I) Err, and remember: Only 59 days until Christmas! :)

-Jersey 8I

"Trouble- By Thousands!"

 Slowly regaining consciousness from my dreamless slumber, I sluggishly licked my obviously drooling chops, and wiped my sleepy eyes.
    “Blegh, eck!” I muttered such gibberish to myself, still continuing to become aware of the surroundings of my room. “Ack!” Shaking the drowsiness out of my head, I pulled myself into a slight, sitting position. “Ugh. Huh, M’ hungry.” Climbing out of my sheets, I peered over to the far right of the room, my eyes suddenly locking on the dark figure standing suspiciously in the corner closest to the entrance.
    “What the?-” I squinted my eyes, staring dubiously at the shape of the mysterious cat, in desperate search of familiar body-language, and silently hoping for a slight glint of light, which would allow me to peer at their design. This cautious exploration of  the shady outline continued for a few more minutes, when I at last, came to my senses.
    “Snake, what in the world are you doing in my room?” I barked at him unamused, expecting a ridiculous response which would result in me having to give him a whack upside the head. I glared at him, whom I noticed, was acting oddly calm compared to his regular, spontaneous personality. In fact, he hadn’t even attempted to reply to my question! He merely stood there with a blank expression of confusion obviously painted across his face. “Okay, Snake. I understand, that for some strange reason you’re under the impossible impression that we’re the best of friends. Yes, believe it or not, I’ve picked that up, and I mean no offense to you when I say this, but- I don't want your filthy, grimy paws crawling throughout my room! Now, if you don’t mind- Get out!” I scolded the foolish Tom sternly, waving my arms wildly through the air in a pitiful rage, certain that I would startle a response out of him- Preferably him running his dirty paws out my door. I waited a moment, though my ears were greeted with silence, as the Tom continued to stand pathetically against the wall.
    I sighed, swiftly losing every bit of patience I had remaining. “ If you won’t leave at your own will, than I shall force you to go!” Dragging myself out of the comfortable bed, I wearily staggered towards the moron standing right before me, wrapped my paws around his shoulders, and began to march him out the entrance, and back into the realms of his own, private quarters of the house. Once we had at last arrived, I stared down at him grimly.
    “Snake, I’m bringing you here because frankly, I don’t want to deal with you! I couldn’t care less of what you do for the rest of the night- Just keep away from my path- And my room!” Shoving him in the entryway of his own chambers and vigorously slamming the door behind him, I began to trek my way back down the distant hall, palming my face as I attempted to digest what I had just witnessed. Snake clearly wasn’t acting like his rambunctiously despicable self. In fact, I could even label him as appearing as if he was  “possessed.” Whatever just occurred, I figured that it’d be best just to forget it and continue with my original quest- Replenishing my grumbling stomach. Waddling my way towards the top of the steps, I carelessly hopped from stair-to-stair, and just as the final step approached, I conclusively pounced into the air as high as I possibly could, and promptly landed on the ground with a strident “Thud!” on my destination floor. With mischief clouding my gaze, I hastily began to rush towards the Kitchen region, when I abruptly heard a faint mumbling, and observed the pale, casted light which grew brighter with each step I took closer to my objective.
    “Please let me clarify before we begin! Am I getting under your skin?” Hearing an unidentifiable voice emitting from the space, I sauntered puzzledly through the dim lighted doorway, curiously pondering who besides myself was awake at such a late hour in the night.
    “Your disposition seems a trifle bland!”
    Glimpsing at my nightly acquaintance, I gasped in shock: It was Snake. Narrowing my eyes, Snake, obviously not noticing my build nosily peeking at his every movement, he continued serenading the “mystery-meat” sandwich he was constructing on the counter next to him. He piled a few pieces of  browning lettuce onto his creation, and with a smack, he topped his meal off with a piece of visibly stale bread.
    “It’s time you learn ‘How To Serve, Man!’” He screeched as he swiped the foul excuse for a snack into his vulgar paws, and violently glomped a piece off of the revolting grub. “Hahah!” Good grief. Considering that he was back to his detestable, stupid-minded self, I presumed that it’d be logical to confront the half-witted idiot about the events which took place earlier in the night.
    “Hey!-” I called towards him, crossing my arms and tapping my foot irritably, as I watched him toss his grueling creation back on the dirty counter, and turn around to face me.
    “Oh, I wasn’t expecting to meet you here, Blaze! Would you like me to make you a sandwich, too? Heh, they are my specialty.” He grinned senselessly at me, as I waved my hand up in disagreement.
    “Not in a lifetime, Snake! I prefer to know what type of meat I’m shoving in my face- Of course, that is, if you can even call that vile grime ‘meat’- Or ‘edible,’ for that matter!”
    “Ahah! Suit yourself, Blaze!” He giggled with a horrid sense of happiness, as he grabbed the bag containing the biowaste of what was supposedly meat, and  disorderedly lobbed the contents back in the fridge, and gradually regained volume in his ludicrous singing, and speed in his dreadful frolicking of delight.
    “Snake, I need to ask y!-” I implored.
    “Beware, the bumps in the night! The shadows on your wall! The nightmares of your youth!” He continued happily, deaf to the evident shake of urgency in my voice.
    “Snake! Shut up!” I rolled my eyes in pure displeasure, holding back the powerful desire to ferociously kick the absurd fool. “I must ask you a question, now!”
    “A question? For me? Ahh, please keep going, Blaze! Hah, I am all ears!” Great, I had at last, caught his attention. I exhaled, breathing away the impatience and hatred I had directed towards him.
    “Why were you in my room earlier, tonight? And how is it even possible that you strolled your way downstairs before I did? I had literally just thrusted you in your own room by the time I had strided my way to the bottom step!” I blurted out, being as unsubtle as I possibly could. By the bewildered expression sewn across his muzzle, I could tell that this wasn’t going to conclude too well.
    “I wasn’t in your room?” He tilted his head as he spoke, gaping at me in mystical wonder.
    “Yes you were! I saw you- You didn’t speak to me, of course- But I still saw you!” I yelled back in a bitter struggle to defend myself.
    “Heheh, I wasn’t in your room, Blaze. In fact, I’ve been wandering down here throughout the entire night. I’m not sure what exactly you saw Blaze, but don’t blame me! Hey, what if you’ve gone insane? Good luck!” Though he collapsed to the floor in a fit of  laughter due to the thought of my possible madness, my reaction was much of a contrast. What if, for the first time in his wretched life, Snake was correct about such a serious topic? What else could possibly explain me seeing an alternative, and tranquil version of Snake? Staring blankly, I walked my way out of the Kitchen and plopped myself emptily atop a couch in the Living Room located in the next room over. I had completely lost the remaining appetite I had after watching Snake eat his gruesome concoction he referred to as a “sandwich,” and now the only thought on my mind was the frightening truth- The constant trials I underwent, the days spent in silence, and even my past- They had caught up to me. I’ve delved into a deep psychosis, and there was no possible way that I could turn back time now. It was too late.
    As I sat, I noticed a shadowy movement in the corner of my eye. Twisting my head in the direction of the source, I observed as Snake paced into the room- No, not the Mr. Sunglasses that we all know and love, but one of the terrifying pieces of my imagination I had spotted previously in my room. Jumping backwards in alarm, I gulped as I saw another Snake enter my gaze.
    “Snake! Help me!” I called in astonishment and disbelief that those awful words had just escaped my lips. “Snake?” I continued pleading to who I thought was ‘true’ Snake, and eventually, after what had felt like endless hours, he casually ambled in the room.
    “Yes, Blaze?” He questioned, utterly and downright oblivious to his two twins sharing space in the area.
    “Look! You’re there! And there!” Sweating profusely, I violently waved and pointed my paws uncontrollably in the direction of the two outlines standing before me. “Don’t you see? Ahh-Ah!”
    “Oh, that’s what you were talking about!” Snake began to chuckle in amusement, as I continued to charade Sunglass-face with gestures steered towards his doppelgangers.
    “Awh, Blaze! Calm down, buddy! I understand  your rambling now!” He proclaimed cheerfully, and I, for a brief moment, spun my head away from the two- No, three!-  Snake’s closing in on us. “You see, I recently found a Cloning Machine lying around, and of course, I  needed to test it! I was going to ask you to volunteer, but had accidentally clicked a button before I had even gotten the slightest chance, and- Boom! Suddenly, there are thousands- Of me! Isn’t it great? You’re not insane, you’re completely normal, pal!” He gave me a pat on the back, still palpably amused by my horrendous, eye-watering fear.
    “Wha- Clones? Thousands? Of you?” I mumbled, unable to believe what my ears were being exposed to. Snake was joking, right? This was merely just a stunt to scare me, yes?
    “Yes! Haha, no insane Blazes’ here!” He continued smiling goofily, pride shining in his eyes as he gaped at his “wonderful” creation. “Look at them! They’re beautiful!” He boasted smugly. I blinked in shock once more, and like a train revving speedily on the tracks- It hit me.
    “No! Ahh!”
    I jolted up from my nightmarish sleep, the sunlight shimmering through my windows peacefully, and who besides Snake, peering over me as I hyperventilated in terror. I opened my jaw to question him on why he was in my room, but my words were replaced by wheezes.
    “Oh boy, Blaze, are you okay? We took note, you were tossing and turning throughout the  duration night- In fact, we even heard you whimpering in fright at a certain point! What happened to you?”
    I ignored his question in time to catch my breath, and recollect my thoughts. “Err, it was just nightmare, that’s all.” I flopped back down, still stunned by what I had just experienced. What a petrifying dream! As if having one Snake lying around uselessly isn’t as terrible as it is! I held my chest, attempting to relax my breathing. “I’m okay.”
    “Thank gosh! Words cannot express how nervous we were for you!” He wiped his brow with a sigh, and gave me a pat on the top of my head. “Guys, you’re allowed to come in now, Blaze is fine!” Snake called out the door, and I, expecting Tornado and Silvester to scamper in, closed my eyes in relief. It was merely a dreadful nightmare. I hadn’t the slightest burden to fear for. I was safe.
    “Okay, Blaze, I know this is going to appear awkward at first, but please- Hear us out!” This didn’t sound comforting. I opened my eyes, and instead of being greeted by the company of my brother and best-friend, I saw only Snake- Three of him, to be exact. “You see, I had come across a Cloning Machine, and-”
    Spacing out, I groaned in rising anxiety. I had just dodged a rapid bullet in my luck that such a ghastly ‘fate’ halted into an appalling dream and as much as I wished it to be true, this wasn’t a nightmare- It was nothing besides the truth, and I had no choice but to accept it.
“All of you, get your slimy paws out of my room!”

What in the World?

This is quite an odd situation I'm in as of now, and I am not exactly sure how I sure react: Confusion, or Fright. You see, I was casually browsing about a fellow Blogger's Profile, reading their Introduction and such. Once my reading was completed, I figured that it'd be logical to take a preview at their Blog, in the case that I had spoken to them previously on DeviantART or YouTube. I scrolled over the link, and me, being my worrisome self, locked my eyes upon the "Html" portion of the link, but then with a shrug, I shook the fear away: I remembered, all sites must have Html located in their coding, for without such Script, the site would be presumed unusable. In fact, even this very site you are visiting now, has Html. Going back to the story, I promptly clicked the link, and watched as the screen flashed, attempting to load the site. I kept my patience, when abruptly- I was directed to an odd Webpage, warning me of malicious content directed on the Webpage. -I know what you're thinking: "Jersey, what are you freaking out for? it's just Sophos Antivirus doing it's job- To protect your Computer from danger!" Ahh, mind you: I never in my life, have seen an Antivirus such as this. It was an oddly-shaded, bright Red page- Alternate compared to Sophos's cool, calm, Blue and White page. I'm assuming that this may be a feature of Windows Defender, which for some odd reason appears to be quite active on my Computer, though a bit paranoid, that this could be a form of Rogueware. No matter, I am a bit puzzled, as to why a Blogspot has been caught with Malware- Yes, I understand that no domain is entirely clean and safe, tough Blogger was the once the least of my concerns. I suppose I should be a bit more careful, now- Or Scan with Sophos, to be sure it's not a bit of Rogueware. Err, I'm going to go freak out now, so, until next time:

-Jersey

Mystery-Meat.

Mystery-Meat Sandwiches: Snake's new favorite snack.

(Disclaimer: Meat may contain Silvester.)

Huh.

"Is bacon a proper stocking-stuffer?" -Curtis. ;)

"Six Foot Deep."

Here's a Halloween and Horror-themed song by none other than the infamous Creature Feature that you should certainly listen to!:

 

 

-Jersey

A Motivational Picture: Curtis Rx. :)

 

Uh, I don't have a witty comment to add to this, so, until next time:

-Jersey